Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Agape Love

The day my Grandma was buried was one of the more beautiful days this winter. Since it took place down in Arkansas, the temperature was warmer than it probably would have been up here in KC, but there was something about that day that just made it seem all that more special. So many of us had worn long sleeves, pants, even a head scarf (Aunt Kay), but none of that was needed. I think the sun warmed us up to about 75 degrees and the wind came in strong from the south.

The church service was nice...nice is too vague of a word, but it was quaint and small. It was held inside a church I used to go to when I was a little girl when we'd go visit family down there in Palestine, Arkansas. The town itself is nothing really, but I will always remember that church. I remember singing a song about "agape love," stirring my imaginary pot of all the ingredients used to make agape love, or God's love found within us. I know my grandma was full of it, and she made sure she her cup runneth over as she rose to meet Him.

Family came whom I had not seen in years. In fact, most of the people there I had not seen since my 7th grade year. That was the last year I ever attended a family reunion. Few friends and family came to see my grandma for one last time, and boy, did she look great! Seeing her in the casket reminded me of the grandma I once knew so many years ago. Her skin was taut, showing not-so-many wrinkles, and her face actually had on makeup! I don't know that I ever remember my grandma wearing makeup unless we were going to church, so I guess that's a befitting way to look when she was walking through the Pearly Gates.

Probably the nicest part of the day was actually at the graveside service at Forrest Park Cemetary, located in Forrest City (pronounced FAR City for anyone from Arkansas). Of course, this is one of the only pictures I have of her children all together--sitting by the casket, heads knelt in prayer. As the preacher was saying a prayer, a gust of wind came in and blew through the tent! I just know that was grandma's way of saying, "Stop crying now. I'm in a much better place here than I was on earth. You'll see me again someday. I'll be here."



Once the graveside service was over, we all stood around talking, catching up with each other and what everyone had been up to since the last time we'd spoken. I asked Mom why Grandma was being buried way out in Forrest City when she had lived somewhere else for so long. She said it was because this area was really where she came from, her husband had been buried there, and she wanted to be buried close to my mom as well. HUH???? Apparently, it turns out that my own mother already has her tombstone picked out, planted, and even has her name already engraved on the darn thing! Now that was a little freaky to see for the first time. My brother wasn't so sure he even wanted to see it, but curiousity got the better of him, and he looked too. Mom said she didn't want us kids to worry about that trivial thing when her time came, so she had it made beforehand. Thanks...I guess...

Sunday, February 15, 2009

She's gone...

Grandma finally passed away yesterday at the ripe old age of 90. She lived 30+ years beyond her beloved Guy, but now the two of them are reunited. Now she can give him all of her love from all of us!

Mom received a call yesterday from her brother, who said that it wouldn't be long now. Of course, Grandma had tricked them all before, but this time, it was real. Mom said that although she couldn't be in the room when her mother drew her last breath, she knows Grandma knew she was surrounded by love. (Mom did not want the last image of her mother to be of her dying, so she opted to stay out of the room. I don't blame her one bit--I would probably want to do the same thing.)

According to my uncle Allan, Grandma smiled twice before she let go of this world. I wonder what she was seeing when she let herself be taken away. Was she seeing Jesus? Those Heavenly Gates? I know she is no longer suffering, and for that, I am eternally grateful.

I do plan on going down for the funeral on Wednesday. It's about a 7-8 hour drive, and that's the longest I will have driven by myself, but I am ready. Maybe a little solitude will do me some good...

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Blond moment

Okay, I just had to tattle on myself because this story is too funny to keep quiet, no matter how much I want to! Since the weather has been really nice the past two days, I decided to get my car washed for the first time in forever. On my way to the car wash, my windows were rolled down so I could get a breath of fresh air and blow my troubles away. I rolled up to the window, put in the kind of wash I wanted, then proceeded to the car wash tunnel. I rolled up my window, drove my tires over the line and put my car in neutral. Just as the car started to lurch forward, the "pre-wash" blast of water came spraying inside my car!!!! Apparently, I rolled up the driver-side window but failed to put up the passenger one. OOPS! Needless to say, I was screaming and laughing, and at the same time, trying to figure out how to get the window up! Once the car had been cleaned on the outside, I had to drive it over to the side parking area and clean up the inside! Now I can say that I've taken a shower at the car wash! Too bad I didn't have my camera!

Edited to add about grandma--she's still fighting to stay alive. The doctors have been saying for DAYS "she won't live through the night" and guess what? She's still here. Everyone is just amazed that she is still alive. The doctor even said that if she is alive on Monday, he's going to pull out the record book to see if she qualifies. This will make two full weeks that she has been off of all machines, no food, no water, nothing. Next week will be week three. Man! I just hope she is not suffering. I want her to go in peace.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Grandma

For those who believe in the power of prayer, I have a request (of sorts). My grandmother, my Mom's mom, is very very very sick. While she's been ill for a while, physically, she's always been okay. Her mind began to slip a few years back, and last Christmas it was evident that she did not know who any of us were, even her own children. Well, now she is in a hospice facility basically waiting to die. Grandma contracted e.coli in her bladder a couple of weeks ago and that caused her entire body to shut down. She only has one kidney to begin with, and it was only functioning at 20%. The doctors have said there is absolutely nothing they can do. She hasn't had any nutrition in at least a week, and now the doctors have taken her off of everything but morphine to keep the pain subsided. All of her children are around her now, so this is my request. I know Grandma will not return to her normal self, and I know the best thing for her would be to pass away peacefully and without any more suffering. This is my prayer. Lord, take her away to you so she can join you in eternal life. Be with her in her time of passing. Please do not let her suffer any longer.

This is a picture I took of my Grandma last Christmas. In fact, it is only one of a few that I have her period. Maybe one day I can find pictures of her and create a keepsake album for my mom. I bet she'd like that...